Roger
While we were being prayed over by a group of friends just prior to leaving home, one brother encouraged us in his prayer to "not hold back." His prayer/encouragement went something like this: "You will be tempted to be timid at some point about the message that God has given you, to hold back, to be less bold about it. God wants to encourage you to step fully into the word He gives you at that time and not to hold back."
We are still adjusting to the change in time and taking a couple of days to re-group before we begin our schedule of meetings and gatherings. Nevertheless, I keep reflecting on this word and on how easy it is to "hold back."
On the one hand, my heart is already so stirred for the people of Kenya and for those from the Congo who will be coming to be with us. I know that these are brothers and sisters who have the potential of producing so much fruit in the needy countries that they live and work in. I also know that, like so many from home, they are bound up by religious ways of thinking: external church rules, superstitious approaches to the Christian life, and a legalistic view of Scripture. I have such a longing to see them step into the passion of knowing and walking with the living Jesus, relating to Him daily in a life-giving, heart-stirring, personal-resting kind of way. Jesus wants to walk with His people. converse with His people, love with us people, empower His people, provide for His people, and be such an intimate, real, personal part of our lives that we are stunned, satisfied, fulfilled, and content in anything or everything that is thrown at us just because we are with Him. He so did not come to give us the rules of life, rather a relationship to be immersed in. He is our friend, father (in every good sense), beloved, lover, keeper, confidant, comforter, and life-partner. When we are His fully, then the fruit we produce and reproduce is also full of life. We function and flow out of his life-creating authority and power. This is my heart for the leaders we will work with in Kenya and the Congo. The world does not need more dead religion. It does need the living presence of Jesus.
That sounds so good, doesn't it?
"Don't hold back." "Step fully into the message that God has given you."
Ah, but that is where the rub is!
There are many reasons to "hold back." I am sure you know exactly what I am talking about. I can sense all of these reasons to hold back stirring in me:
- Inadequacy. After all, do I really, fully exemplify the message that is stirring in me? Don't I need to be walking it out perfectly before I can share with others what is in my heart?
- Incompetency. Even though I have done this type of ministry for years, the voice comes up: "You don't have what it takes."
- Fear of risk: If I really press into the message that I sense God has given, will it offend? Will it put off? Will people be displeased? Will the message be rejected? Will God work through it?
Do you know these voices and reasonings?
Perhaps we can encourage one another in this. If there are areas where you are tempted to hold back because of your own insecurities and false inadequacies then you can relate to me. Perhaps, together, we can defy the enemy's voices, forget about our own limitations, and risk stepping into more of what God wants to do through us.
"Don't hold back."
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